The Path to Happiness

Summary The first challenge in Niebuhr's formula for less turmoil and greater well-being in our lives is to figure out what we can change and what we can't. Many times we think we can alter things that aren't in our control (such as other people's feelings or behaviors), and we make ourselves crazy trying to make them change. On the other hand, we often ignore the things we actually can change (such as a situation in which we find ourselves or how we feel about it). Thus, we stay locked in the struggles of an unrewarding job or a family-of-origin situation that frustrates us almost to death. Or we feel stuck in a relationship filled with disappointment, pain and anger, though we want it to be different. And so we struggle to get what we think will make us happy, or to make a relationship work, but we just end up feeling frustrated and exhausted. The Path to Happiness process will give you the opportunity to look at situations in your life that are upsetting you and to gain clarity about what you can change along with some strategies for improving those troubling situations -- or at least your feelings about them. You'll also learn to let go of those things not in your control, be they as significant as other people's behavior or their feelings about you or as inconsequential as how you feel about being slowed down in traffic. Peace of mind comes from knowing you've done what you can to change a situation (done some work, expressed your wishes, or set up consequences for others' behavior), then letting go of the outcome, whatever it may be. Once you accept there are "circumstances beyond your control," regardless how much you wish there weren't, you can learn to let go of the result. And you'll find serenity and peace of mind, regardless of that result. Resources 25 Resolutions For Happinesss What Can You Change? Change Your Beliefs Process Path Basics Core Exercise Shoulds Worksheet The Path to Happiness Reading List